Woke up this morning with a terrific urge to lie in bed all day and read. Fought against it for a minute. Then looked out the window at the rain. And gave over. Put myself entirely in the keep of this rainy morning. Would I live my life over again? Make the same unforgiveable mistakes? Yes, given half a chance. Yes. - Raymond Carver
Sometimes, offer more than talking. Say, “I like you very much.” Say, what when cut grows over pink and white? Carnations, skinny daisies. Devise a way of saving your words. Say nothing if it’s forced.
A list of things i’d rather not tell anyone: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5.
I will be squinting in the dawn, squirming like a grub, the effort of myself too heavy next to the seven o’clock grace of you, so long and soft and living. I am bending back the spines of all your books, that you remember who was here to do the damage- I was her. I was here.
For here he was in her world, a place few had been invited to see with their own eyes. And here was she, wanting him there. Him, no one else.
I wait to unburden myself of the day’s dressings (shuddering them away to lie ghostly with limb- shaped convexities at the side of our bed), to fuss and huddle in the cover til we face inward in conspiracy, foreheads burning and welded. Oh, my heart, i want to tell you that the blood travels faster in my body when you’re near, even the tips of our noses stooping to...
Ex Boyfriends They hang around, hitting on your friends or else you never hear from them again. They call when they’re drunk, or finally get sober, they’re passing through town and want dinner, they take your hand across the table, kiss you when you come back from the bathroom. They were your loves, your victims, your good dogs or your bad boys, and they’re over ...
I almost went to bed without remembering the four white violets I put in the button-hole of your green sweater and how i kissed you then and you kissed me shy as though I’d never been your lover .
“Remember me when you are at the beach and above all when you paint crackling things and little ashes. Oh my little ashes! Put my name in the picture so that my name will serve for something in the world.”
“What are you thinking about?” You always hated it when I asked that question. “It’s a tricky question” you used to say. That it’s an illusion we can pretend to bridge the gap between your thoughts and mine. For you, every person is like a planet and two different planets can never become one. Two people together will always be: one plus one. I...